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Edition 17: Results by Denise Robarge Tanaka

flag USLara Clarke offers another service that stays off her business cards. Not everyone is ready to have the darkness of their past stirred up. But for those special customers, Lara has a special skill, and sometimes they come looking for her help. The touch of the seedy underside of Hollywood in this paranormal psychic adventure leaves you feeling like a dirty deal has been done. SY


“So how does it work?” the client asked, not even taking off his sunglasses.

I get that question every time. People expect lots of chanting gibberish, incense that smells like burning a hippie’s sandals, furniture thumping, lights going out…You know, all that poltergeist crap. My specialty services are not listed in my front office brochure. Lara Diane Clarke, clinical physical therapist, can get you back on the team after that sports injury or back to work after that fender bender.

Not many people know about my paranormal services. He only found me by word of mouth, and even through his sunglasses, I could tell he didn’t believe.

I told him, “You just need to sign the waiver and I’ll prick your finger with a sterile needle. That’s it.”

“That’s it?” he asked skeptically.

“Yep.”

He scanned around the room like he was searching for the hidden camera. I couldn’t blame him for being suspicious. What I do is pretty strange.

“Shouldn’t I fill out a questionnaire or tell you something about my—”

“No,” I said. “That’s what you pay me for. I don’t do interviews. I get results.”

I deliberately used that word, interview, knowing the impact it would have on an actor.

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